Handicapped Stalls
I love when I'm at work and... scratch that; I hate when I'm at work. I love being at work and having to go to the bathroom. Ok, well... forget that, too; I don't love going to the bathroom. What I'm trying to say is that I love when I'm in the bathroom at work and I find that the handicapped stall is available. It's like being given an upgrade to First Class. Anyway... I hurry past the other stalls (you know, the cheap seats) and into the makeshift spa. I close the door behind me as if I'm hiding from mall security and then look around. It's so freakin' big in there that they may as well set up a hot tub and a 52" LED screen. I can sit and relax in peace without feeling the pressure of being spotted. That's all I need... a co-worker who looks down at my shoes from the stall next to me and thinks... "I know those shoes." I don't want anyone realizing I'm in there. If someone sits next to me, I wait them out... even if it takes hours and my leg falls asleep to the point of having to be amputated. I leave when I'm good and ready.
Buddha
Reader Comments (3)
I love that you wrote about the public restroom experience. I don't know how many unwritten restroom related posts I've written in my head while 'waiting them out'. Great post :-)
You are funny.
Oh my lord - I totally am with you on the shoes. My friends used to tease me cause I'd move my feet so people wouldn't see my shoes and find me. It was the only way I'd be left alone!