Cheater
I'm 40-years-old and tonight, for the first time in my entire life... I've been called out for cheating. I got caught. I didn't mean to do it; well... not initially. I just couldn't help myself. The new girl was better in every way - flexible, able to take me again and again ... no matter how hard it was or how demanding I got. Oh, and... the way she massaged my shoulders and... every inch of the head. When I met her, I knew I could never go back to how things used to be. I was taking a risk, for sure... but so worth it.
Let me explain. It all started about two years ago. I met Carol out of necessity, to be honest. I needed to be taken care of and she was available. It wasn't all that great, but I didn't have a lot of options and I didn't want to hurt her feelings. I gave her some cash and walked out the door; it became a routine. I went looking for her one night, though, and she wasn't there; that's when I ran into Janette. Tall, slender, elegant - a Vietnamese beauty who could cut a man down to size with no more than a look. It turns out that Janette was the best one there ... and boy did I pay for it. For the past year, she has taken good care of me. It was perfect. I'd show up to see her, she'd offer me some wine, work my shoulders ... my head ... and then get down to business. I knew Carol wasn't there on Tuesdays, so I only booked Tuesdays.
Carol was there tonight... a Tuesday. She saw me waiting for Janette and lost it. "I thought you moved away", she said ... her tone bitter, full of disgust. "You're seeing someone else now?" It was painful ... uncomfortable. I couldn't tell her that yes, I have been seeing another woman ... that ... yeah... she's better and knows how to please me in ways you can't imagine. I stayed quiet. My god it was brutal.
She continued. "I thought we had a bond. I thought I knew you. I only made $20,000 last year; your money would have helped. I guess you can't trust a man. I can't believe you did this to me. Do you go to different doctors and dentists, too? Unbelievable."
For those of you who know me, you're probably confused. "I, uh... I thought he had a girlfriend? If he's not in a relationship, who's the girl in all those photos? Did he cheat on her with another girl, then cheat on THAT one, too?? What a pig!"
Carol, you see... is my former hair stylist; Janette... the current one. I go to a men's salon where they serve you free liquor, offer massages and pretty much pamper the shit out of you. Carol was a total whack job from the moment I first met her... always telling me how she was quitting and how they didn't pay her enough. She'd try to get me to buy into some new age, holistic crap or a late-night infomercial that made a convert out of her. When a friend of mine from work came back from there with a horror story, I smiled and asked one thing... "Carol?"
Yes... it was Carol.
Janette, on the other hand, has been nothing but amazing. She's their master stylist and never tries to sell me anything (or join her cult of the day) and gives the best massage I've ever received - and that includes the many incredible experiences I've had in India and Philippines.
I really was looking for Carol that night, but Janette stepped in and did such a great job that I didn't hesitate to book with her from that point on; I just called and found out when Carol WASN'T there and... Tuesday's it was. I realize I could have gone somewhere else, but oh... Janette was too good. I could have sat Carol down and shamed her into quitting her chosen profession, but no. I suppose it was bound to happen sooner or later, but ugh.
Drama at a hair salon. I need a drink.
Buddha
Reader Comments (7)
When you have a good thing, why mess it up?
So funny! I almost used that same photo on my blog today!
Your tale is one I often fear...you did what you had to do. Now that you got that off your chest, how 'bout that drink? ;)
Ha! Funny story and I LOVE that picture!
Yeah. It gets even stranger. Carol called my cell the very next day and begged me not to tell the owner what she said. It seems that Janette was aware of the conversation, obviously wasn't thrilled and told her she was going to report her. It was intense.
wow dood, this is what the "Writing Block" could never be all those years ago. You do remember the "Writing Block" dont you?
I hate those people who get obsessed with something, like Noni Juice or Juice Plus, or a complicated vitamin regime, or working out, or religion. Unless, of course, the cult features me. :)
This was hilarious!